Death to all raccoons

"DasWauto" (DasWauto) 06/13/2018 at 20:55 • Filed to: Trash panda

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I swerved but that fucker was determined to have his death wish granted.

For Sweden > DasWauto 06/13/2018 at 21:01

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More pictures of raccoons looking to find and harass DasWauto

BlueMazda2 - Blesses the rains down in Africa, Purveyor of BMW Individual Arctic Metallic, Merci Twingo > For Sweden 06/13/2018 at 21:01

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UPS*

wafflesnfalafel > DasWauto 06/13/2018 at 21:06

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Sounds like an opportunity to try out a new aftermarket front clip!

(We have a couple groups of local raccoons - one likes to wake me up at night pounding our deck furniture into the side of the house...)

Honeybunchesofgoats > DasWauto 06/13/2018 at 21:16

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Never swerve. Living in deer country, I can tell you that those fuckers don’t want to die. Hit the brakes, but hold your lane. They might go left or right, but they don’t want to be right in front of you.

nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul > DasWauto 06/13/2018 at 21:18

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Yesterday morning I had a squirrel try to juke and fake out the Escape. Thankfully I was quick enough to read his juke and avoid him as not to splatter the idiot. But yeah, don’t try to juke a multi thousand pounds vehicle

DasWauto > Honeybunchesofgoats 06/13/2018 at 21:23

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Don’t worry, there was plenty of braking involved before I turned. He just seemed to sit there until I moved. I’ve braked, then swerved and missed plenty of wildlife in my time - this is the first time avoiding action hasn’t worked out in my favour. I’d have hit 3 deer a week into owning this car if I didn’t. Can’t win them all, I guess.

PS9 > DasWauto 06/13/2018 at 21:25

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Hey, come on man. He just lost all his friends in the infinity war, a suicide attempt is to be expected. Have a heart.

Honeybunchesofgoats > DasWauto 06/13/2018 at 21:29

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I once saw a Tahoe swerve into a peacock. I’ve hit a few chickens in my day, but I’ve never seen an explosion of feathers like that. It was as beautiful as it was horrifying.

winterlegacy, here 'till the end > Honeybunchesofgoats 06/13/2018 at 22:13

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Tell that to the deer that made the suicide run out from the trees through tall bushes into my front right fender.

I couldn’t have seen it coming.

ItalianJobR53 - now with added 'MERICA and unreliability > DasWauto 06/13/2018 at 23:25

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Squirrels are just as bad:

https://oppositelock.kinja.com/damned-squirrel-1826202018

pip bip - choose Corrour > DasWauto 06/14/2018 at 06:20

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as someone who lives in kangaroo country, we told over and over, NEVER swerve. just hit it dead centre to minimise damage.

OmerCarrothers333 > DasWauto 06/14/2018 at 08:17

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I feel the same way about squirrels. They’re fuckers.